Shissou Word

Shissou Word (失想ワアド Shissō Wādo) is the fifteenth song of the series and is featured on the album Mekakucity Reload.

Background
This is the first song from Mekakucity Reload and was announced on August 15, 2017.

Jin's Comment
‘Can’t you do normal things?’ Aah, I wonder how many times I’ve been asked this. I deem ‘normal’ to be a word with an awfully cruel ring to it sometimes. Even when I’m intending to do my best, I look like I’m slacking off to other people. At times like these, I logically end up suffocated by those words. If only I could become ‘normal’. If only I could do things like ‘normal’. The protagonist of this song is also afraid of ‘normal’ and loses her ‘words’. ‘I want to disappear for good.’ Just what 'words’ are delivered to her as she wishes for this? I want you, who can’t ‘act normal’, to listen to this one song as well.

Information

 * Words / Music / Guitar：Jin
 * Movie：Sidu
 * Guitar：Hideyuki Gushimiyagi
 * Bass：Mashirou Shirakami
 * Drums：Yuumao
 * Strings：Shika Udai Strings
 * Violin: Sachiko Oki / Mikiko Ise / Miho Shimokawa
 * Viola: Shouko Miki
 * VOCALOID Edit：Jin / Sakana
 * Strings Arrange： Jin / Shika Udai Recording
 * Recording Engineer：Nagie

Lyrics & Translation
鏡の中から　「おはよう、朝だね」 いつも通り表情は最悪
 * -|Kanji=

ぎこちない笑顔も　寝癖も　仕草も 何もかも　嫌になるなぁ

理不尽だな

伝えたいことなら　人並みにあるけど 何一つも　言葉に　変わらない

俯き加減に　今日も口籠る

「挨拶もできないんだね　かわいそう」

庭のハナミズキは綺麗で ただ羨ましくて　見ていた

それに引き換えたなら　私は

本当、ダメな子だ このまま　いなくなれたら

不思議なことに　この世界は 「普通なこと」が　難しくて

言葉一つも　返せないのが バカらしくって　泣いている

めくるめくような　勘違いを 繰り返して　嫌いになった

つぼみのままで　枯れてく 未来に　言葉が見つからない

怖がったような　変な顔 逃げちゃうクセ　ダメだ、ダメだ

恥ずかしくて　口を噤む

…ほんとう、嫌になるなぁ

凛と咲いた声で　笑える人がいて 花のような言葉を　交わす

鏡の中から　途端に責める声 「・・・私にはできないんだよ　ごめんね」

それは　絵に描いたような世界で ただ羨ましくて　見ていた

邪魔にならないように　私は 私は　どうしよう

失くしたい　失くせない　あぁ

溢れ出した　自分自身は ひどく惨めで　汚くって

誰にも知られないようにって 部屋の隅で　泣いている

「失くさなくても　大丈夫」って 不意に声が　耳に届いた

魔法みたいな　響きに なぜだか　言葉が見つからない

怖がってないで声にしよう 言いたいこと　「話せ、話せ」

間違ったような　「泣声」が出た

ほんとう、バカだよなぁ

たどり着いたのは「未来」で そう、色めくような世界で

大人になってゆく私は 変わり続けていく

変わらない想いを 大事に　抱いていく

不思議なことに　この世界は 「思い出す」のが　難しくて

忘れたくない　言葉を 失くさないように　伝えて行く

いつか誰かと　この世界で 笑い合えたら　ちょうど良いなぁ

そんなことを　考える 未来に　理由が見つかりそう

寝癖、直して　外に出よう 今日もまた　一輪、映える

鏡の中　咲いた花に 「おはよう」を　返したら

Kagami no naka kara “Ohayō, asa da ne” Itsumodōri hyōjō wa saiaku
 * -|Romaji=

Gikochinai egao mo neguse mo shigusa mo Nani mo kamo iya ni naru nā

Rifujin da na

Tsutaetai koto nara hitonami ni aru kedo Nani hitotsu mo kotoba ni kawaranai

Utsumuki kagen ni kyō mo kuchigomoru

“Aisatsu mo dekinainda ne kawaisō”

Niwa no hanamizuki wa kirei de Tada urayamashikute miteita

Sore ni hikikaeta nara watashi wa

Hontō, dame na ko da Kono mama inakunaretara

Fushigina koto ni kono sekai wa “Futsū na koto” ga muzukashikute

Kotoba hitotsu mo kaesenai no ga Bakarashikutte naiteiru

Mekurumeku yō na kanchigai o Kurikaeshite kirai ni natta

Tsubomi no mama de kareteku Mirai ni kotoba ga mitsukaranai

Kowagatta yō na hen’na kao Nigechau kuse dame da, dame da

Hazukashikute kuchi o tsugumu

...Hontō, iya ni naru nā

Rin to saita koe de waraeru hito ga ite Hana no yō na kotoba o kawasu

Kagami no naka kara totan ni semeru koe “...Watashi ni wa dekinainda yo gomen ne”

Sore wa e ni kaita yō na sekai de Tada urayamashikute miteita

Jama ni naranai yō ni watashi wa Watashi wa dō shiyō

Nakushitai nakusenai a~a

Afuredashita jibunjishin wa Hidoku mijime de kitanakutte

Dare ni mo shirarenai yō ni tte Heya no sumi de naiteiru

“Nakusananakutemo daijōbu” tte Fui ni koe ga mimi ni todoita

Mahō mitai na hibiki ni Nazedaka kotoba ga mitsukaranai

Kowagattenaide koe ni shiyou Iitai koto “hanase, hanase”

Machigatta yō na “koe” ga deta

Hontō, baka da yo nā

Tadoritsuita no wa “mirai” de Sō, iromeku yō na sekai de

Otona ni natteyuku watashi wa Kawaritsudzuketeiku

Kawaranai omoi o Daiji ni idaiteiku

Fushigi na koto ni kono sekai wa “Omoidasu” no ga muzukashikute

Wasuretakunai kotoba o Nakusanai yō ni tsutaeteiku

Itsuka dareka do kono sekai de Waraiaetara chōdo ii nā

Son'na koto o kangaeru Mirai ni riyū ga mitsukarisō

Neguse, naoshite soto ni deyou Kyō mo mata ichirin, haeru

Kagami no naka saita hana ni “Ohayō” o kaeshitara (Unofficial Translation)
 * -|English Translation=

The reflection in the mirror says, “Good morning, it’s another new day” and as usual, the expression on my face is the worst

My awkward smile, my bedhead and my every action the more I look, the more I despise them all It’s unfair, really

There’s a number of things I’d like say, as anyone else might but these thoughts never seem to form words

Keeping my eyes on the ground today too, I struggle as I search for the right words to say “Wow, she can’t even say hello?” “Poor girl”

The plants in the garden were so pretty Envious, I simply watched and comparing myself, I realised just how hopeless I was If only I could just disappear like this…

Strangely enough, in this world we live in even accomplishing the most “mundane” things can be difficult Just thinking about how I was incapable of answering to anything made me feel so stupid, I could only cry

The same dizzying misunderstandings just kept repeating and I would just come to hate them repeatedly A flower bud that began to wither before it could bloom, I thought my future would surely be a wordless one

A strange expression on my face that resembled fear This habit of mine, always running away - Gosh I’m hopeless, so hopeless So embarrassed, I decided to keep my mouth shut I'm really starting to hate it all

There are people out there who laugh, and it’s like their voice is blooming People who exchange words that resemble beautiful flowers Suddenly, the reflection in the mirror says in a begrudging voice, “…I’ll never be like that” “I’m sorry“

It was a picture perfect world out there Envious, I simply watched What should I do so that… so that I won’t ever get in the way? I wish I wasn’t like this but I can’t stop being like this, aah

And as my very own self began to overflow It was terribly pathetic and unbecoming So that no one would ever find out, I could only sit in the corner of my room and cry

But out of the blue, a voice reached out to me and said, “It’s okay, you’re fine just as you are” as if those resounding words were magic, I found myself speechless

Don’t be afraid, put your thoughts into words All those things you’ve bottled up - Say them all, say them all but it came out all wrong, and I could only cry out, “I really am an idiot, aren’t I?“

What I eventually arrived at was “the future” Yes, a world painted in vibrant colours And as I continue to become an adult, I continue to change while still holding onto these unchanging, precious feelings of mine

Strangely enough, in this world we live in Even the act of “remembering” can be difficult So that I won’t lose sight of these words that are so important to me I’m off to pass them on

It’d be perfect if one day, in this world, I was able to laugh happily with someone else and as I’m thinking about things like this, I feel like I might’ve found a purpose for myself in the future

As I fix my bedhead, I decide to head out Today too, as I look straight at the petals of the flower reflected in the mirror “Good morning again,” I respond and begin to make my way

Trivia

 * This song's story was previously told in Kagerou Daze VII -from the darkness-.
 * The characters appear in relation to their number in the Mekakushi Dan.
 * It was voted as the #17 Kagerou Project song in the KagePro Song Popularity Ranking 2019.